Christmas is famously a time of giving – and what could be better than the gift of mirth? 2020 has been a challenging year for everybody. By the time the festive season arrives, we’ll be all looking for a reason to crack a smile. Christmas is the perfect opportunity to tickle some ribs with a funny secret santa gift. Whether you’re drawing from the hat for a work colleague, a friend or a family member, everybody appreciates the opportunity to emit a belly laugh upon unwrapping.
Fortunately, you’ll be spoiled for choice when it comes to selecting such a present. Let’s take a look at ten funny Secret Santa gift ideas that are sure to raise the roof. Each of these novelty items are available on online shops such as Amazon, so you won’t even need to brave the high street to generate guffaws during your gift exchange.
Old Age Emergency Plastic Pants
With age comes wisdom, experience … and the ever-present risk of incontinence. It’s one thing to bust a gut laughing at a funny Secret Santa gift, but nobody wants to burst their bladder at the same time. That hazard can be mitigated with these emergency plastic pants.
These functional yet oh-so-stylish undergarments are unisex, so there’s no discrimination on who you gift them to. They don’t even need to be presented to a recipient that’s advanced in years. We’re not convinced they’re safe for use in the tumble dryer, though.
£3.99 | View product
Once the sole reserve of long-distance truckers, Harley Davidson-revving bikers and wild mountain men that look really scary with an axe in their hand, beards are now the ultimate hipster fashion accessory.
If somebody in your circle sports excessive facial fuzz for decorative purposes, these multi-coloured beard baubles will make a hirsute colleague the belle of ball at a Christmas party. Just make sure they’re removed by the end of the twelfth day of Christmas.
£5.73 | View product
Poo Emoji Stress Ball
Have a colleague that is visibly sick to the back teeth of client BS while on the phone? This stress ball is the perfect gift. It’s a chance to let out all that frustration without saying anything they are supposed to regret, despite meaning every word.
Best of all, this particular product is made of scented foam. That means, as well as relieving stress through squeezing, it smells a lot sweeter than it looks. Just be careful where your colleague leaves it after a working day. The cleaners may need a stress ball of their own if they see this on the office floor.
£7.99 | View Product
Personal Voodoo Doll
Have an arch nemesis you’re keen to exact payback upon? Maybe it’s a neighbour whose cat uses your lawn as toilet. Perhaps it’s somebody that said, “hey, I’ve discovered an amazing band called Nickelback, check them out.” It could even be the person that bought you emergency plastic pants for Secret Santa.
Whoever slighted you, for whatever reason, this voodoo doll can be fitted with a photo of the dastardly ne’er-do-well. Stick a needle in the doll’s elbow and laugh softly to yourself when they bang their funny bone on a doorframe. Revenge is sweet.
£7.00 | View Product
Multi-Coloured Umbrella Hat
Know somebody that is prone to leaving umbrellas on the bus or in the back seat of a taxi? Need to spot somebody in the January sale crowds from a distance? Have a friend or family member that gets their jollies from poking strangers in the street in the eye?
If you answered yes to any of those questions, this headwear makes the perfect Secret Santa gift. It’s an umbrella that doesn’t need to be carried, and it can’t be turned inside out by a strong wind. It can also be used to dress as a parasol at a costume party if the recipient stands very, very still.
£2.83 | View Product
“I Took Part in Secret Santa and All I Got was This Mug”
We all know what Secret Santa entails, but hope springs eternal. Maybe, just maybe, you’ll be the lucky recipient of a Caribbean holiday or the keys to a new Mercedes from a generous benefactor. Or, more likely, you’ll just end up mugged off.
All is not lost for the recipient of this receptacle, though. It’s shatterproof, dishwasher safe, and – get this – it holds hot tea or coffee. Plus it provides the perfect opportunity to passively-aggressively sip at a hot drink while mentioning how much you really need a sunshine holiday while your Skoda is in the garage.
£5.29 | View Product
Boris Johnson Toilet Paper
We were in two minds about whether to include this particular gift on this list. Not for any political reasons – we just pondered whether toilet roll should actually be featured in a rare and precious category in the age of COVID panic buying.
All the same, if you know somebody that considers BoJo’s speeches to not be worth the paper they’re printed on, this is the perfect solution. If the recipient is a fan, so much the better. They can admire Britain’s illustrious leader during their most private moments.
£5.98 | View Product
Do you let out a groan every time you see somebody head to the bathroom with a rolled-up Financial Times under their arm? You can eradicate lines for the loo with this timer. It’s certainly a cheaper gift than an enema.
Operating an hourglass model, it leaves plenty of time for anybody to purge themselves of an extra serving of Brussel sprouts and then get back to business. Just think of how much that extra time will improve productivity in the workplace.
£4.99 | View Product
Senior Moments Fine Collection Money Box
Finding that your older colleagues can’t remember your name without cycling through six alternatives first, or sick of reminding your partner where they left their glasses?
Start fining them for these misdeeds and collecting the cash in this lockable money box. We recommend a one-pound penalty every time you’re told you need a haircut and that modern music is just noise. You’ll be financially set for your own retirement in no time.
£5.74 | View Product
Basket Case Headband Hoop Game
There is only sensation in the world more satisfying that successfully throwing a screwed-up piece of paper in the bin from across the room. We refer, of course, to pitching a perfect throw that lands square on somebody’s head. We mean soft balls here, not bricks.
You can embrace your inner Michael Jordan by offering this game as a funny Secret Santa present. Alternatively, wear it yourself and let others have a turn. Maybe rethink some of your social interactions if you find that friends, family members are lining up for a turn to throw things at you, though.
£7.34 | View Product